My friend Lacey came to see me this weekend. She came yesterday afternoon and left a little bit ago. So fun to have someone here with me. I will admit on chemo weekend, I’m not a very good hostess and I appreciate so much that I have friends who understand that. I mean really I move from the couch to the bed and that’s about it. If your lucky, I will get up and operate the DVD player for you!

So, Netflix is a new addiction. Some very gracious people gave it to me a gift through this journey, and I am so grateful. Knowing that this would be a long weekend, I got a series of movies that all go together….Love Comes Softly, Love’s Long Journey and Love’s Enduring Promise. Yeah, I’m a sucker for the “Hallmark type” movies. They were good and I’ve got the next two queued for next week when I mail these back in.

We had to watch the third before Lacey left today. But, in the first one, I heard a quote that I found very appropriate:

The truth of God is not that He allows bad things to happen, but His promise is that He will be there with us when they do.

So many times during this journey, I have heard people say I just don’t understand why “bad things” happen to “good people”. I have even said this phrase myself, but I think instead of wonder why things happen, the only thing we can control is how we handle it and who we let help us. There are even moments that I still find myself wanting to find out if there is something that I could have done different and of course as I look to the future is this something that I could pass on to my kids. But, you know sometimes, things just happen.

I’m starving. Like my stomach is even growling, but nothing sounds good. I don’t know if I need someone in front of me with a plate of food, but if you were to look me in the face right now and say “what do you want to eat?”, I would have no idea. And, while I always hate digging in the refrigerator or freezer, I have even less motivation when I don’t feel good and don’t have any energy…which usually means that I eat junk.

I’ve also had this fear this time that I’m going to get sick. So, I’m trying to be careful, but in the process, I think I’m making it worse. So, I’m off to find something to eat. I might get to meet my nausea medicine.