Well, well, well. Back to work. Today started like any other Monday, meetings with my staff, meetings with my team and a few brief moments behind my desk. Even though it might seem that Mondays make me crazy, I love them. I am one who likes to work with a plan and getting all my projects lined out, really helps. I’m also a huge fan of teams and see real value in how they make me personally more effective, so it is always so good to come together as both an Admissions team and an Advancement team and collaborate. Sometimes you need people with an outside perspective to give you the insight you’re looking for.
This afternoon, Dr. Kluck called and told me that Mrs. Horne had called Dr. Mendelsohn’s office and they had my results, but she couldn’t get them and he couldn’t get them without me in his office. In the second of pause that followed, I quickly responded, “so, do you want me to come over there?”. “Yeah” was given as a very quick response. So, I took a super huge deep breath, grabbed my cell phone (lesson one learned on Wednesday night), announced with my big mouth that I was headed over to the clinic and pranced, in my black high heels, myself across campus. Of course I ran into a couple people. Some that had heard and some that had not, but all realized that I was going to hear the news of a lifetime. What is this?
Dr. Kluck called in and after some digging, found the lady we were trying to reach (I love that he is so persistent. What a blessing!) I could tell after probably the first sentence was spoken that it was what we thought it could be. Some form of lymphoma. SWEET! I know that sounds weird, but at least we know now. He continued his conversation trying to find out what kind. So answer # 1 came, but we are needing two. Yeah…they don’t know that yet. So, we know it is some form of lymphoma, but we do not yet know what type. She said we might be able to find out at my appointment with the oncologist on Monday (April 7). Yeah…your math is right, that’s 7 days from today. But, you know. That’s ok. If wait until then is what we have to do, then it is what we will do. No blaming, no asking more questions, just waiting b/c that’s what we have to do.
Asking why without the “because I said so” response was not really something we got away with growing up, so I fully understand what dealing with waiting is like. You know I have a very simple faith in life in general. Although some would disagree, I’m not extremely gullible, but if something just is, it is. Black or white, one way or another. It drives me crazy when you are in a group and the total of yes votes and the number of no votes don’t add up to the total number of people voting. Maybe that mentality is helping me and maybe not, but here are some things that I do know.
1. I have a amazing support group that is surrounding me. My family, my Ouachita family, my Arkadelphia family, my girls and my friends near and far are incredible.
2. I will never be able to drink fruit punch without thinking of my CT scan and all the “Contrast juice” I had to drink.
3. I could not ask for a better staff or counselors and an administrative team. Not only do I feel supported, but totally surrounded by overly capable people!
4. God is in control.
5. There is not a better place to be than in the center of God’s will. And, while he did not cause this to happen, he allowed it to. So, for that reason I will be grateful for the opportunities ahead.
6. I now know that a small, simple, mustard seed faith can help.
7. I will wait, because that is what we have to do, to find out what all this is and what treatments we have in store.
8. I will go on doing what I know to do until I know to do something different. And, yes that does include talking and laughing and making stupid jokes.
9. My mom made a total mess of my apartment today. But, it is ok, she is on a cleaning frenzy and she is doing good things that I have been putting off for months. That lady rocks!
10. God is in control! Have I mentioned that yet?
Our prayer now changes. Well, we still pray for God’s miracles and for this to be gone. But, we also pray for this to be a very treatable form of lymphoma that has a smooth treatment and remission process. God is so good…he’s so good to me!
Sweetheart, you give me courage as mom and I face this with you. You have a great faith, and I hate this for you, but your submission to God is beautiful and we will all learn as we walk this treacherous road. May you inspire others as you face this. I love you. –Dad
Just read your blog this am and now I know how to pray even more specifically. You are one amazing girl. I always knew that in many other ways but your attitude is so amazing. You know they say that you can” see what someone is made of when they are squeezed.” I see peace and I see Jesus all over you. I am praying for healing. I prayed for an infection yesterday to be the reason for the swelling in your neck so now I will take on the attitude you have set before everyone and just pray for the next step in your life and for exactly the kind of cancer this is.
You are a blessing to me as I read your blogs. My HR department prayed for you yesterday in our staff meeting.
Love ya. Barbi
Keisha,
Thanks for including me in your email list. I realize uncertain times reveal what is certain, and you are already clinging to Him. I love you girl, and I truly believe God is going to do something amazing through this experience. May God reveal more of his grace and mercy at this hour to you. I love you, and I believe in you, Keisha. I know I have not been the best of friend in keeping in touch, but I want you to be encouraged today. Your friend,
Todd Gaston
Hi, Keishia
I received an email with your blog from my brother-in-law who works for TI and knows your cousin. I am definitely praying for you as you go through this time. God has a plan and we just have to wait and see how He works…that’s the hard part! You’re awesome!
Dottie Garett
(mother of Rachel & Nathan Garrett)
Hey Girl!
Lean on him-he can hold you up! Know that your Gardner-Webb friends are praying for you.
I will keep checking back on you!
Nathan
Keisha–
Byron got word from Ms. Betty about you! I’m so sorry you are going through this, but I’m so proud of your courage and strength! You amaze me, truely! I’m praying for you. I went to bed praying for you and was up at 3:45 thinking about you. I figured since I couldn’t sleep I should pray, so that I did! I’m reading your blog. Thanks for sharing your thought so we know how to pray for you. God is good to surround you with wonderful doctors and great friends. Praying for your parents and little sis too. Love you–Dalissa
You are truly a woman of God! You go girl! Now, you can put a name to it! I want you to know that I have put you on my parents prayer chain in Chicago as well as Scott’s parents prayer chain in Tulsa. Needless to say, people in a lot of states are praying for you and rejoicing in that fact that we serve a GREAT GOD and He is in the business of miracles and love. My prayer for you is that you will be showered with his love, strength, and healing. We love you and know that “Greater that HE that is in you than he is in the world”. Anne
Keish –
You never cease to amaze me with your strength and ability to comfort those around you. Even when you are the one facing the trials, you are trying to find the best way to comfort those around you. You will never stop being “Mama Keisha”. I know I can’t physically be there with you for this and I hate that because I want to be so badly. But know that you are constantly on my mind and more than that you are in my prayers. I love you girl and I’m holding your hand and hugging your neck from Dallas.
Linz
Keisha, you’re not going to believe this but tonight I was going through some boxes of old papers and school folders from way back when…. and I happened upon a sheet of paper with some awfully scribbly writing on it… I could hardly make it out, but I realized that it was “Keisha’s Song” dated 12/00. Do you remember that? “sometimes she laughs, and sometimes she cries, but no matter what there’s stars in her eyes…” – Jenny Adkins
“…looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.” Heb. 12:2
Keisha:
What a tough, tough girl you are. I hate you are facing this, but obviously you have so much courage and so many people loving you and praying for you (me included)….you are a precious girl and I can’t wait to see you.
Carolyn (Lindsey’s mom)
Keisha – Brandon and I have been praying that you would see CHRIST in all of this. He is life and joy and wisdom and strength. The LORD has allowed this to happen for His glory, and just as your father prayed last week, God will reveal His plans and purposes for it. I pray you will be able to share your faith with the doctors and nurses around you and that this blog will aid in spreading the Gospel of the glory of Jesus Christ! love you so much and am constantly praying for your heart and that through this, no matter the outcome (though I will specifically pray for healing), you will see God in the most amazing way and as you have never seen Him before. –Maggie Sheridan
Hey Girl, Long time since we’ve seen or talked to each other… but one thing has remained the same … you are still AMAZING!!!!! Heather emailed me the news and I want you to know that you will be in my prayers and beyond that there is nothing more I can say because you have embraced this time in your life having the faith of a mustard seed and knowing that through it all God has a purpose and is there every step of the way. I can not wait to hear the rest of your testimony. You are truly a BLESSING!!!!
Love ya,
April
If you ever stop talking and laughing and making stupid jokes I will personally make my way to Arkansas and kick your tail. 🙂 Okay, maybe not…you could take me! Seriously, though, you are a great example to me! We’re praying for you!
Sarah Bible