I had a friend recently ask me the question about what tips I had to help transition her Kindergartener to Big Church. It was a fluke night at her church where there was no church nursery, but her kids had to go somewhere, so they went with her. Thankfully it was a kid’s choir program, but still, it’s not easy to sit still when you are 6.

Growing up the daughter of an almost five-decade preschool teacher, it seems like I have it all together. But, frankly at 37, as a new mama, I’m figuring it all out. By this time so many of my friends have kids getting close to middle school and I’m still learning how to treat diaper rash. But, thankfully I have someone to call – Mama Sue!

So, when she came to hang with us for a couple weeks last month, I nailed her down to share her best ideas for Successful Ways to Transition your child to Big Church.

The main key here is to get your kid to buy into the process and what you are trying to do to transition to this next stage. Make it a celebration and have them help you pick out their favorite things

-Mama Sue

Tips for success of getting your child ready to transition from childcare to Big Church:

• Start early. Do not wait until it is the week they have to go to church to talk about the transition or to take them to church.  Find special things in the weeks and months leading up to the transition time for your church and promotion. It is a hard transition and easing them into it will make it more successful for your family. Kids nights, music programs, and youth presentations are great nights to “try out” big church. Experiences other than church can help them with the transition as well. Library gatherings, school concerts, community musicals, and children’s movies are all great places to teach them to be still, listen, and pay attention to the program going on.
• Only use the bag for church. Do not use the bag as entertainment in all other environments. Maybe a wedding or graduation, but the big church bag and things in the bag are special to that occasion only and the only time they are played with.
• Get your kid involved. Don’t let this just be something you do for them as just a gift. Yes, you want to make it special and will include a few surprises along the way, but let them pick out things to include in their bag and decorate it so they are proud to carry it and use it.
• If your church does not host it, help coordinate a “Big Church Banquet.” Parents come and you have a kid-friendly meal on a weeknight a few weeks before they first have to go to Big Church. Let the kid lead their parents into a table and “pick their spot” this helps them start learning leadership and ownership of this process. Put a color page placemat on the table so the kid has “their place” to sit during the meal. After the meal, present a Bible to each kid that they can start bringing to church with them. Then all walk over together to the Worship Center and show them around. Let them walk up on the stage and see where the preacher sits and where the music minister stands. Let them walk over to the organ, or piano or drum set. It’s really special if your pastor, staff or a musician would meet you. Lead your kid to the place where you normally sit and let them look around to see where their friends are (note – “your place” may need to change during this transition time.) Before you leave, come back to the front and let the kids pick out a couple of their favorite songs for you to sing together and pray before they leave.
• Rotate the items included in their bag and only include enough sheets for that week. You will need to replenish supplies from week to week to keep your kid from being overstimulated and going through a whole activity pad in one week drawing and coloring on only part of each page.
• KISS – Keep it Simple Sister – do not include more than 10 different things in your bag. Too many options can sometimes be worse than not enough.
• Store the bag in a consistent place in your home. Sunday mornings are always a rush. Layout the bag on Saturday before your kid goes to bed and they will start owning the processing and learning about preparing themselves for worship before they arrive.
• Hit the dollar store. The turn over of stock changes seasonally and monthly sometimes. Pack your bag at the beginning from one trip, but periodically take a stroll down the kid aisles and see if there are any new items to include. Back to school bins are also a great time for new activities.
• Do not let your child start digging through the activities in the bag until the pastor starts his sermon. Encourage your kids to participate in worship and save their activities for the sermon section of the service.
• Coloring in the bulletin – One first activity they could do each week is color in the “o” in the bulletin or announcement sheet. Then they could do other letters like – a, b, p, d, e. Anything that has an open space in the letter. Later you could assign them a letter each week where they underline or circle all the “a” that they see and then next week is “b” – you would cycle through the alphabet at least twice in a year.
• Be consistent in making your child follow rules and set new boundaries.
• Do not include things that make noise.
• Do not include things that will damage the area in the pew or on the floor.
• Steer clear from electronics whenever possible. This teaches them to pay attention and move away from electronic distractions while they worship.
• Ask your kid questions about what they learned on your way home or to lunch. As you see your child’s attention shift, encourage them to take notes and listen more closely to what the preacher/teacher is sharing. You could even give them a trigger word each week to listen for and make tally marks on their sheet each time it is said.  They are not too young to start absorbing God’s Truth and the messages in the Bible.
• Help them find the scripture and follow along as it is read each week. Mark it in their Bible or help them find it when you are asked to turn to the main passage.

One thing that is always helpful for this transition process is a bag of “tricks” you can take with you on Sundays that will keep them occupied and happy while they sit with you through a church service.

Items to include in your Big Church bag:

• Get a fun bag. Take them to the Dollar Tree or your favorite store and let them pick out a special bag. You could even hit a local hobby shop and pick out a blank canvas bag that you can decorate together.
• THEIR OWN Big Church Bible – help them get in the habit of bringing it to church with them each week.
• Colored pencils
• 3×5 index cards (8-10 at a time)
• One sheet of small stickers
• Magic pen or disappearing marker color sheets or activity pad
• Etcha-sketch or Magnadoodle – quiet drawing activity that you can erase. Look for travel sizes of each of them
• Flashcards – decks of words, math, historical facts, age specific
• Small action figures – character figurines or animals that the child can play with quietly
• Pipe cleaners – they can use these to make shapes or help tell the story they are hearing from the pastor
• Fun pads (mazes, word search, coloring that are half sheet size – pull out a few sheets each week instead of
• Avoid toys with small pieces – I assure you they will drop them at the most inopportune time of any service
• Trinkets and toys you would use for giveaway bags and party favors.
• Tracers – these come in lots of different styles – but a great item to look for at a local dollar store.
• Limit them to 1 fruit snack and 1 lollipop each week. Maybe it’s a different kind of candy, but again make it something they like and that you can keep only for that time. If they eat it early, they don’t have it again. And, there is something about the reward and anticipation each week.

Items to leave out of your big church bag:

• Markers and pens – they would draw with them on their clothes or books if your church has hymnals and bibles in the pew backs.
• Permanent Markers – see above and read PERMANENT
• Chalk
• Glue
• Playdough
• Electronics

What about you? What have you found to be helpful in your past with the bigs at your house? Did you have a Big Church bag as a kid?