As it turns out…my milkshake does not bring all the boys to the yard….
About 3 weeks in to feeding a newborn, I discovered that my grumpy little guy may not be suffering from gas issues after all. He might be crying because he is HANGRY. As I investigated more and let intuition and discernment kick in I realized I might not be producing enough milk and that’s why he was always grumpy. During week 3, we were consistently feeding more than an hour on average and he was just crying all the time. I knew there had to be more to what was going on. So, I did some research (when you sit 7 times a day for up to an hour, you have lots of time to read!) and tried a few things to help with milk production
- More water – in the process of research, I found out that breast milk is 88% water. So, if you do not have enough water in your system, your body doesn’t have anything to pull from to make enough milk. I tried with every feeding to drink 8 oz of water. I’ve always been terrible at drinking and in tacking liquids, but I tried really hard.
- Fenugreek – this supplement can be used for lots of things, but one of them is milk production. I took it 3 times a day, 1 capsule with each meal.
- Lactation Cookies and Muffins that include Brewer’s Yeast, Flax Seed and Oats
- You can go to Pinterest and search and come back with a TON of ideas. I found ones that used pre-made package mixes with just 3 new ingredients added. It falls perfectly in my semi-homemade cooking mindset and was just much easier to mix up without having to do all the “from scratch” options.
- I found my 2 recipes here: Muffins – Cookies – the first round of cookies I made were with a Gingerbread mix I had left over from Christmas time, they were so good. And, for muffins, I made a batch of cranberry orange and blueberry cheesecake. I’m one of those people who can’t eat the same thing every day for breakfast, so the 2 flavors gave me options and I just froze half of each batch and breakfast is already ready for next week!
- And changed up the way we were feeding:
- Like “normal,” I was feeding my little guy from the breast and then after I got him settled I would pump. Many times there was just not enough time before I would feed him again. He was feeding for an average anywhere from 37-67 minutes. Then, I would have to calm him and get him resting. He was often still cranky and I was exhausted. We also started noticing that he was super cranky from 5-8ish each day. He would get hungry before the 3 hour feeding schedule times. I thought a lot of his issues were gas. We tried lots of things. Something just didn’t feel right and as his mama, I just struggled with how much he seemed to hurt and never be able to settle. So, we kept researching and kept thinking and at some point a little intuition kicked in.
- So, I decided to try feeding him from a bottle to see if he would even take it and much less would take it from his mama. We got lucky. The first bottle we offered of breast milk, he sucked it down so fast. I knew “supplementing” was an option in front of us and something our doctor was suggesting we consider. I bought I canister of newborn formula and my mom suggested we introduce it along with breast milk instead of going all in for one feeding. So, on our first attempt, we offered 1 oz. of breast milk (because that’s all I could get from the pump at the previous feeding) and then 2 oz. of formula. He did good. He was immediately in a “milk coma” and was so restful. I thought we had found a miracle. We tried it again at the following feeding and had the same result. I decided to pull one of the bags of milk from the freezer so we start working on getting in a routine with pumping and offering breast milk. I tried it over a weekend and it took off. I would feed him from the bottle – up to 3 oz of breast milk if I had it and then supplement the remainder amount up to 3 oz with formula. Then after he was settled, I would pump. It became pretty obvious during my pumping sessions that I was not producing a full 3 oz. and the amount would deplete during the day. It made our experience of a fussy baby make so much sense. He was just hungry and I was not producing.
So, how did this work introducing the bottle to our baby?
- Introduced formula slowly – didn’t just go full throttle in case he didn’t take the formula or wasn’t sure about the bottle. Also, we did the breast milk and formula in separate bottles. My research suggested not mixing them at first until you knew how much he would take because you didn’t want to waste your breast milk with leftovers in the bottom of the bottle.
- This new method gave me freedom for help from others. In the evenings and on the weekends, my husband was able to feed him the bottle and I could start pumping. This just made each session not seem quite as long. Also, he was full and content each time, he gained the weight he was not getting. That just made for a more content baby and happy parents.
- I’m still tethered to a pump at our 3 hour feeding schedules as opposed to just going all formula. But, pumping takes less time since the pump has a timer on it. And it gives more flexibility since you are feeding the baby every 3 hours, you are good as long as you get a pumping session in during the 3 hour cycle. Its not as rigorous and regimented as feeding the baby.
- And, I’m not building up a surplus of milk like I was trying to do by pumping after I fed the baby on me. With this system, I just keep milk in fridge as I pump it and just feed him that throughout the day. As the day goes on, I just feed him what I can and then supplement the difference with formula. I don’t stress about that surplus because I know if I have to, I can just do a formula bottle if there is no milk.
- Another reason this worked was the mental clearing house I walked myself through. I’ve never been a die hard breast feeder…I was committed doing it because I was convinced, and still am, that it was the best option for my baby. And, it was free! For those who only want to do breast feeding, this may not be your option. You may really need to dig deep in to the milk production options I’ve offered and others you find. But for me, and my husband, the frustration of our baby and pressure on me were things we just really needed to resolve. There is so much stress and changes that come with having a new baby that if there was something we could do to resolve this, it was worth it to us to consider options. I still try to feed him on me in our morning feeding times, but my body just isn’t producing and I had to come to a different conclusion for our family.
**UPDATE – we have settled in even further. I cap off at about 4, 4oz. bottles a day. So, I’ve figured out our rhythm and it has helped us with flexibility now that we are so much more on the go. I pump 3 times during the day – sometime after the morning feeding, in the afternoon (before dinner) and then at night before I go to bed. These 3 sessions usually get 4 bottles worth of milk and then we formula feed during the rest of the day. I just try to be flexible with it all. I take my pump with me on road trips and I’ve even pumped while driving down the road. (what can I say, I like to multi task)
At around 3 months, I dried up. I was pumping multiple times a day, and only getting enough for 1-1.5 bottles. It just wasn’t worth it any more. My little guy had adjusted to formula, I was drying up and the stress of pumping and doing everything else was making me grumpy and adding weight to our day. So, 3 and a half months in, I stopped all the things.
If you are a mama reading this (and actually got this far) and are struggling with breastfeeding, let me tell you, follow your instinct. You will find people on both sides of the aisle – extreme breast feeders and sold out, never going to do it. You follow your mama gut. No, they don’t sent one home in the bag of supplies from the hospital but kinda like your love for this little kid randomly exploded, your mama instinct just randomly develops. Your family has to decide what’s best for your child and make the best decision and adjust when something else needs to happen.
