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My inbox and Facebook notifications have me overwhelmed. The little red bubble beside my Twitter icon has me reeling. The sticky note on my desk leaves me bumfuzzled and we are not even going to talk about the pile of things on the couch in my living room.

My mom has always given me a hard time about living in a fish bowl; growing to the size of my world. That usually refers to the amount of junk I seem to accumulate. But recently I’m beginning to thing it refers better to my calendar. 
I’ve confessed often that I don’t do “still” very well, but now that I’m home during the week I’m finding myself filling every night. There are so many things I want to do and so many people I want to connect with but I’m overwhelming myself. 
And we can’t even begin to talk about web and social media. Since it’s where I live all day I just want to shut it down when I get home. But bc I try to keep it business as much as I can during the day, I just feel behind. This past weekend at the bloggers conf I was reminded how far behind I am. And you know what?  I think it’s ok. 
I’ve spent much of this week telling myself that. There is only so much I can do.

I came away from #AWBU with so many ideas.  But, my ideas became a to do list that right now feels insurmountable.  For whatever reason, I cant seem to get over the “back to school hurdle”.  I know I don’t have kids, but it seems the world revolves around the academic calendar.  Church classes start up, volunteer cycles begin, community programs establish themselves and we are left remembering one more reason why we love the lazy days of summer.

So, I guess maybe this is my confessional.  My out loud spoken word so I don’t feel like I’m letting you down with the fact that I just left a conference that should have pumped me up to crank out words like nobody’s business.  But, instead I’m left with one more item on my list.  One more post to hit “publish”.  One more measure of insecurity and inadequacy on my self-appointed measuring tool in my head.

Whatever it is, I’m confessing.  Fall is my favorite time of year.  I want to be present as much as possible.  I want to create some memories with the new friends I’m developing and frankly…its easier right now to keep up with my instagram (@bigpittstop) account!

So, here’s to a few written words.  Some confessed guilt.  And, finally something I can mark off my to-do list!

(true confession: I actually started this post on my phone waiting for a meeting.  I closed it and added to it while I was sitting, bored, in a different meeting.  And now, a week later, I’ve come back to it because its bothering me that’s its been left open ended.  Maybe I should really put a few therapy sessions on my Christmas list!)